Many years ago, I was leading a public seminar and one of the people who was on my production team said to me; “I bet no one tells you no. You always get what you want”. That was not entirely accurate, but close. I get told no. I have no issue with being told no, that just lets me know that is not the right path and I need to take another to get what I want. And I do.

When I arrived in Los Angeles with my daughter, we checked into a hotel that had good reviews on a site I always use to book my stays. It was NOT up to par. There were bugs, the towels were paper thin and tiny and when I took the dog out to walk, I observed a couple of hookers leaving rooms and walking right back out on Hollywood Boulevard. We checked out. I am not staying here and I will get my money back. I did. I contacted the site I booked through, registered my complaint and got what I wanted- my money back. We checked into another hotel that was more in line with what I wanted. Now, that was an extreme example, but many people simply tolerate things they do not want.

On one hand, I understand it. Especially for women, and especially in the South where I live. It is cultural to be ‘nice’,’ to go along to get along’, ‘to not rock the boat’. I understand. However, what I say to my clients is how I feel: Who are you that you do not deserve to get what you want? Why would you sell out on yourself? It IS a sell-out to not stand for what you want.

Mostly, I am told it is because confrontation is uncomfortable. Really? First, why is standing for what you want confrontation? Uncomfortable? Really? As opposed to you putting up with something you did not want? Seems completely crazy to me. Reality is all you are doing is speaking, and someone else is speaking—no one is going to die or suffer physical harm. Really. Speak up.

It will not hurt, I promise.
YOU CAN GET WHAT YOU WANT. Simply speak up and stand for it.